I work with couples and individuals who may be struggling in their romantic relationships. Hitting roadblocks in relationships due to life stress, financial strain or infidelity is normal. Choosing to live one’s life with a partner is a brave (yes, brave!) choice and sometimes requires an outside perspective when things get sticky.
I employ an evidence-based approach grounded in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy.
Together we will clarify what type of relationship you would like to build together and what is currently standing in your way.
I believe it is important for each individual in a couple to examine the old stories our mind presents us that may be influencing the relationship (e.g. “I will always be abandoned,” “he/she doesn’t truly love me”) so they become less impactful.
As a couple, we will look at how communication and behavior may change when these stories get activated or other thoughts and judgements get in the way. We will learn to observe all of this chatter from an objective distance so that we are more in charge of communication, particularly during conflict. Expressing anger is a healthy and often productive part of being in a relationship. The trick is learning how to fight in an effective way that maintains safety, is resolved with kindness and promotes growth.
Additionally, we will explore your values as a couple by examining the qualities that define you when you are acting as your best selves, both individual and together. This will allow you to feel more empowered in making behavior changes that are in line with these more meaningful concepts. It will also foster more vulnerable and honest communication.
Putting all of this work together will create a safe space to tackle any of the concrete issues you are facing such as challenges with intimacy, learning how to fight well or making decisions about family planning, work or finances.